The Full English.
Unless you live in Ireland. Then it’s, The Full Irish.
Not sure what it’s called in Scotland. Probably – A deep fried Mars Bar.
So, in the interest of diplomacy, let’s call it, The Full Monty.
This sanitized version needs more beans. There’s probably only enough beanage for a sausage and half an egg. And the toms are underdone. They need black bits on them. They could be in a salad for Christsakes. And, if your mushrooms can hide your bacon, you’ve either not got enough bacon, or your mushies are too big.
Some fry-ups have black pudding, which I’m not a fan of. If you don’t know what black pudding is – it’s sheep’s/pig’s/cow’s blood mixed with oats as a thickener, then dried and fried. In Ireland, you get white pudding, which I do like. It’s sort of like sausage – but spicier. (Irish pals might be able to enlighten me.)
Sausages and eggs look perfect. White toast – check. Brown sauce – check. You could go for a cheeky hash brown if you’re feeling a bit ‘Stateside’. Swap that insipid cup of tea for fresh coffee and we’re laughing.
You’ve got me through so many hangovers – for that, I am truly grateful.