Category Archives: Games

Meet the Superhumans


If you don’t live in London, but you do live somewhere else in England, you might be a bit fed up of hearing the media banging on about what legacies London 2012 will leave for the rest of Britain.

Well, the clue’s in the name, people!

I live in sunny Stockport, in the northwest of England, and I couldn’t give a rat’s ass what kind of legacy London 2012 will leave for Manchester.

We had the Empire Games back in 2002. And we still have loads of lovely legacies such as the Etihad Stadium, where Man City play. Then there’s the velodrome, where people can ride their bikes… I get a bit stuck after that.

You don’t hear Londoners whingeing about the Commonwealth games not leaving a legacy in t’ Big Smoke.

They’re not our games.

It’s a non-question. It’s non-news.

To be honest, the Olympics don’t do a lot for me in terms of sporting excitement.

I’m more of a turn on a sixpence put it in the back of the onion sack kind of bloke.

What does excite me though, is this ad for the Paralympics by those lovely people at Channel 4.

It really makes me want to watch the Paralympics much, much more than the Olympics because of their Superhuman attitudes and abilities.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not suggesting for one second that Olympians are any less motivated or hard working than Paralympians.

But, because I’m not that interested in the Olympics, it would have to take something superdooper special to get me interested. And this does.

Yes, it’s a little bit predictably shot, but it does get the hairs on the back of my neck standing, so job done. Not all ads are aimed at the head.

Not only is it a great ad. But I’m really looking forward to seeing some of these gladiators in action.

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Me, the thief.


Where do you get your ideas from?

I get asked this all the time in my job.

I usually reply that the ideas come from the information I am supplied with to do the job.

All you have to do is jizz it up a bit in your creative cocktail shaker and see what comes out.

Sometimes it tastes like piss.

Other times it tastes like a Mojito mixed by Mr Hemingway himself.

But there are a few other ingredients that go into the creative cocktail shaker that aren’t in the brief.

These are taken from all the stuff you soak up in your daily life: art; literature; music; ads; news; gossip; film; blogs; tabloids; soaps; comedy, et cetera, et cetera.

What turns your cocktail from being piss into ambrosia is what bits of your own inspiration you put in there.

I came across this quote on the Gutenberg Press II:

I read something similar by Picasso a few years back. But in the spirit of the quote – he probably pinched it from someone else in the first place.

Here are a few bits of graffiti that you may have seen before, but what I like about these are how they integrate their art with the environment, rather than the environment being purely a canvas.

Whilst out for a saunter with my two girls, the eldest, who’s 5, said: Daddy! That looks like a cup!

This is what she was looking at…

Kids get it.

It’s adults who unlearn it.

Inspiration lurks everywhere, if you want to be inspired.

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You have 30 seconds to relax…


The other day, instead of doing something useful like bettering myself, I was taking a little time-out to play solitaire on my phone. (Sometimes I think it’s this kind of lack of commitment to work that the economy’s in the state it’s in.)

Anyhoop, it was a new app I’d downloaded so I was having quite a few go’s. After game 5 or so, a message flashed up saying: New fastest time!

I hadn’t realised I was playing against the clock.

I hadn’t even realised I was actually ‘playing’ against anybody or anything.

I don’t know about you, but when I play solitaire I do it to relax. Not to flap through a deck of cards like David Blaine on Soho market.

At first, I did try to beat my previous time. But I soon found that I was getting myself all in a tizzy because I’d only got 10 seconds before I slipped further down my own self-imposed rankings.

This was no way to live life.

So I got one of those little red stickers, the sort you see next to paintings in an art gallery, and I put it over the timer on my phone.

So now, when I’m playing solitaire, I’m blissfully unaware of just how pathetically slow I am.

It’s much more relaxing.

Bit of a bugger when I’m texting though.

What’s next – Speed meditating?

(P.S. If you do want to know: 2’54”)

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